The story of exchanging our back fence and how love and blessing can make wonders
Our back fence
I’d like to share a story with you, which happened to us last summer.
Behind our back fence we had a wood fence. So actually we were separated from our back neighbor by two fences. Obviously that wood fence wasn’t in our garden, it was in our neighbor’s garden, our neighbor put there some years ago. Actually the function of this wood fence was to separate them from us, because back then they had a pool, and so they didn’t want us to see them, while they are using the pool. So to tell the truth, we hardly had any contacts with this neighbor, because we never met each other.
Removing the old fence
My husband wanted to exchange our back fence, because it was quite old and shabby. So he removed the old fence (not the wood fence). So we still couldn’t see our neighbor’s garden. But he actually made a big mistake, he removed it without telling it to our back neighbor. Well, of course we didn’t want to keep that in secret, just because of that other fence, and because that we didn’t have any contact with them, it just didn’t occur to us, to tell them. But really we should have told our plan to our neighbor.
Effect of removing the old fence
So the other day our back neighbor came to talk to us very angry. He said to put back that fence. My husband said sorry for not informing him before, and told him that he would like to install a new fence. The neighbor said, that he wanted back the old fence, he didn’t want any new fence. It was his fence, he had installed it (about 30 years ago). We told him that we bought already the new fence, and we would like to install that one, but he insisted on the old fence. He even threatened us to prosecute us if we didn’t put back the old fence.
We were very frustrated, especially my husband. After some minutes I managed to step out of the situation. I managed to look at the conflict from another perspective. From a completely different perspective actually. In the past I’m sure I would have judged this man, how could he be so cruel, how could he be so mean, how could he be so crazy. I would’ve said things like that. But now I felt something else. I felt compassion. I was wondering how unhappy he could be. Because if you’re happy, you don’t do things like that…
So I decided that I would meditate and send love and blessing to him. After that I decided that I would talk to him the other day. My husband didn’t want me to talk to him, because he was afraid, that he would tell us again to put back the old fence, and he said he wouldn’t do that. But I insisted on talking to him, I really hoped that sending love and blessing helped.
My response and the solution
So the other day I talked to our neighbor, I asked him to start the conversation again, because we had good relationships with all our other neighbors, and I didn’t want him to be the exception. I said sorry again, for not telling him that we removed the old fence, and asked him to let us install the new one. To my great surprise he said: ‘Of course, just do it’. I told him that I was glad that he changed his mind and we didn’t have to put back the old fence. Then to my surprise again he told me that he hadn’t told us that we should put back the old fence. He said that he didn’t care if we put the old one or the new one. Then we talked a bit more, and when we said goodbye, he told me that he appreciated that I went there to talk with him again.
The effect of sending love and blessing
So this is the story. The strangest thing was in this for me that he couldn’t remember that he told us to put back the old fence, but actually that was the main reason why we had the conflict. So in his reality he remembered completely different, like we in our reality. Which is true? Both? I don’t know. Really… I know that we wouldn’t have had the conflict, if he hadn’t insisted on putting back the old fence….
Things like this happened many times after sending love and blessing. That it seems that things are „deleted” from people’s memory. It’s so strange for me, actually it’s kind of like magical. I really don’t know how it works, but it does. And that’s the point.
And how can you send love and blessing? Click here to read it.
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